Coaching Tip: Self-Deprecating Behavior: What to know and how to change it.

“Don’t Belittle yourself.  Be BIG yourself.”-Cortia Kent

Learn to accept a compliment.  Learn to value your input at meetings.  Learn to say thank you and continue to appreciate your accomplishments without taking something away from yourself.

Self-deprecating behavior (See blog) is a negative form of accepting a compliment.  It is also prevalent when providing a comment at a meeting, starting your sentence with, “I know this is a silly question…. This sets the scene for seeing less value in what you are about to offer.  If you do not value your opinion, who should?

Be aware of how you value or show lack of value for your comments or accomplishments.  Be proud of your accomplishments and opinions.


  • Do what you love to do.  Create an experience for yourself. Make it your special accomplishment.  Share the experience with a friend.
  • Use a journal to write what you feel grateful for.
  • Write your legacy statement.  What is it that you want to leave this world, how do you want to be remembered?
  • Pay attention to others who also use self -demeaning language.  Turn around what they say to be a positive reflection of something discussed.
  • Before speaking, be aware of the positive nature of what can come forth from your words of wisdom.
  • Accept the compliment; say thank you and go on with your work.
  • You are allowed to believe you are good at what you do.  Let others know of your skills and accomplishment.
  • Be your own advocate

Your self-esteem is very important to how you live and work and share your self with others.  No one is perfect.  We can all use some improvement.  Feedback from others is a good thing for you to utilize for knowing what to do.  Negative talk from yourself and said to others is not beneficial.  Use what you know to improve yourself and this will ultimately lead to a better self-esteem.


Contact: to discuss this tip and more.


I am always interested in hearing how you have used my coaching tips and the results you have.  Share them with a friend.




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