Coaching Tip:You Can Find Your Passion-feel free, creative, productive, excited!!!

“I have no special talents. I am only passionately curious.”-Albert Einstein

What is passion?  Have you ever felt excited about what you were doing and wished it was something that would pay the bills?  Or have you felt that nothing seems to be moving you toward that special part of one’s life where all happiness can be found?  Some are fortunate to be able to turn one’s excitement into an avenue to pay the bills.  Or use our excitement to supplement our daily working lives.  People are more productive if they do what they love to do. First, how do we find our passion, that place where we can experience heightened awareness of what we love to do and do well?

Activity:

Take time out to discover yourself through silent meditation, exercise, walking along the river, in the woods-some place conducive to deep thinking.

  • When have you felt great satisfaction?  What were you doing? What was the result ?
  • Who among your acquaintances do your really enjoy being with? What makes this so?  What do they do that you enjoy doing?
  • Do you have a hobby that excites you?  What do you get out of doing this hobby?  Do you share this hobby with others?
  • Ask others about what you do that they think can be of great importance.
  • Find other people who enjoy similar activities that excite you.
  • Develop a list of goals that align with the excitements you feel. Work on strategies and take action in getting good at the activities that excite you.
  • Check in with others who can appreciate your excitement.

Knowing your passion can change the way you feel about your job, your life outside of work, and the way you can be of help to others.  You can feel liberated and create extraordinary opportunities.

I recommend reading: The Element-How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything by Ken Robinson

Please also check out my Passion Questionnaire.  It will help you in becoming aware of what finding your passion can help you accomplish and help me with a study.

Let me hear your comments.  Email me at: isabel@uniquepathways.com

 

 

 

How Finding Your Passion Can Change Everything

“How Finding Your Passion Can Change Everything”

Ken Robinson, in his book: The Element-How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything, makes the reader aware of the lives of famous people who only found happiness in their careers because they had a deep desire and love of something that excited them and they became good at what they loved to do. Being in one’s element constitutes a sense of freedom and authenticity.

The author relates the necessity of being in your Element-that place that you feel aligned with your excitement and have people, your tribe, who find this place inspirational and productive as well.  That excitement is your passion.  Being passionate is inspirational and can propel you into extraordinary places for life’s creativity and innovation.  As stated by John Donovan, chief technology officer at AT&T, “Good leaders inspire their employees to achieve great things.” He feels it is not an individual effort, but a team effort that results in achievement that can be shared by all.

How often do our managers or leaders get to know what our passion is?  What could be the result of being able to pursue our passion on the job?  What is the result for ourselves and the way we operate in the workplace?  *There are methods to employ to really learn about what excites you, what your really love to do can be something you get really proficient at and able to keep you excited about more mundane occurrences.  Passion can drive the desire to excel.  When we recognize our passion, and not all of us are aware of what that is, we can experience a great satisfaction and self satisfaction can be our definition of success.

Please click on the link provided to answer a Passion Questionnaire.  This will help me with a study and make you more aware of the need to think about this subject for yourselves and those you work with.  Your “tribe” may be closer to you than you think. Check out my coaching tip on “How to Find Your Passion”.

Even Extroverts Can Overdose On Excitement

extrovert overdose excitementNo doubt in anyone’s mind, anyone who truly knows me, I am an extrovert personified.  What that means is: give me something to do, give me more to do, give me even more to do, tell me to meet and greet with several groups in a short period of time, present me with a challenge of a life time, ask me to research ,etc and I will accept all this with open arms.  For me it is stimulating, enriching, exhilarating, value added, and just plain reaching a “high.”  Ask an introvert to accept all of the above and watch him/her retreat perhaps with anxiety.  This isn’t saying that one is better being an extrovert or an introvert.  Actually there are benefits within both types of behavior.

Many people are in job positions where they must be out in the public selling, reporting, making speeches, and facilitating.  The extrovert will handle this with less anxiety than an introvert, not that one has more knowledge: it is the individual’s make up in behavior that dictates the comfort level.

But the show must go on.  And so it does.  The introvert can become overwhelmed by the activity in a room socially or during an organizational meeting being expected to come forth with a solution to a problem immediately.  He/she needs thinking time to come forth with a valuable answer to the problem situation. The extrovert thrives in this environment. However, his/her answer may take less time and thus may not be as thoroughly thought out.

Susan Cain, in her book Quiet-The Power of Introverts, draws out the benefits of being an introvert even though in society most regard being an extrovert as more positive. Leaders of organizations must be attuned to the benefits from both types of individuals.  Leaders themselves will find themselves in the position to relate to the many obstacles that their employees face.

I started this with me, the extrovert personified, and will end it with how I dealt with being overwhelmed and overdosed on the excitement that I looked for and accepted.  “What would it be like to be an introvert?”, I thought.  So I actually went to extremes.  I booked a cruise, by myself, made arrangements to dine by myself and spent time being by myself.  I shut myself off from what normally creates my happiness and excitement. I really had to work at being in the moment and less gregarious and definitely less talkative.  I was discovering a new world: it was peaceful, relaxing, and afforded my mind to be creative without the usual foreground and background noise.  On the next to last day of the cruise, the waiter walked me to a shared table.  At first I wanted to say,” No I would rather be by myself”.  But I didn’t.  I actually had some anxiety about being back in my usual element since it had been several days where I had been living in a different world, so to speak.  I took a deep breath and realized I hadn’t lost my step.  I was back in my extroverted self, however this time, aware of the other people’s needs and conversational view points.  I became a full-fledged listener and learned a lot.  It really was a wonderful experience.  I encourage you, who are one type or another, to try something different sometime.  You will learn more about how you operate and how others around you view you, and what you have to say.

 

Coaching Tip: Women are not just from Venus: Men are not just from Mars

“Men of quality are not threatened by women seeking equality.”-Unknown

How can you be a woman and win in a man’s world?   How can you be a man and accept women for their input to your organization? You are as qualified as the men on your team, but you are not being heard.   You have opinions and want to discuss them. You are a man in a meeting and all you want is: “Just give me the bottom line”.  Yes, this is just one example of the different communication styles between men and women.  The following activity addresses the way women can be and with this knowledge, men can understand how to allow women to add to the “conversation”.

Activity:

  • Be assertive and to the point expressing what you need in a brief format
  • Speak slowly and clearly to gain attention.
  • Be yourself and align your body language with your verbal language showing confidence
  • Be heard and take credit for your accomplishments
  • Feel good about your value to the organization
  • Be a leader, show your strength and take on tasks that will challenge you
  • Work /life balance is hard to achieve: work/life management is needed, so prioritize.
  • Be open to asking for help as a mentee.
  • Ask for clarification of  terms if not understood.
  • Refrain from harping on an issue: give people time to analyze your points.

Let Isabel know how this activity works for you.

Email: Isabel@uniquepathways.com

Look for my blog about women finding self worth in a man’s world in the BLOG section.

 

 

In the Beginning G-d Created Man and Woman and it Was Good……

Women have fought a tough battle to achieve the respect they deserve in the workplace in having gained the right to vote, overcoming gender discrimination, striving for equal pay for equal work with the passing of the Lilly Ledbetter law.  This year a record number of women are in the CEO position at Fortune 500 companies.  Women have “broken the glass ceiling” however, there is still a need to be heard in many organizations.  They must speak a language that will gain them an audience.                                        

My father once told me, “As a woman in a meeting, never start your discussion with: I’m sorry but….”This he told me in the “70s.  I haven’t apologized for anything since!!  Actually I weigh my words to make certain they are of value to all concerned and leave people open to offer their own input. I have kept those words of advice in my mind.  I see where the “I’m sorry but…” can be misconstrued as weakness and insecurity.

We are now in a completely new century.  I am quite a bit older and wiser, and my father has gone to a better place.  What can women here on earth find as their better place in this time of strong male dominated competitive corporate environments?

No, women must not act as men do, however they must know what makes men act the way they do to get a leg up, so to speak.  Obviously, women and men are physically different from one another.  But they are physiologically and emotionally different as well. Women bond, men compete; women discuss, men solve.  Renee Weisman, in her book: Winning in a Man’s World, states that men must understand the fundamental issues that exist. In this way they can be more effective in selling to women, in communicating to and accepting job tasks from women, and simply communicating in an effective non condescending manner in order to create a beneficial atmosphere for productivity.

“It is not what you say, but how you say it….”  The tone of voice, the body language, the use of appropriate words all communicate what you really feel.  The hidden agendas show through.  The insecurities are obvious.  The overpowering attitude is predictable.  Authenticity reins true.  Be relaxed in your own body.  Know what you want to say and be ready to listen and open to opposing points with your steadfast reliance on your true self.  Know the goals.   As in a mathematical problem, there are many ways to reach that goal.  As a woman offer your thoughts and back them up with data.  Be prepared to “win them over”.  As a man, learn that women have an intuitive ability at solving problems.  Look for the possibilities in that.

And remember, “In the beginning all was good………”

I recommend reading Winning in a Man’s World by Renee Weiss.  I also recommend reading my Coaching Tip: Women are not just from Venus; Men are not just from Mars in my Coaching Tips section.

Please email me with your comments: isabel@uniquepathways.com

 

Coaching Tip: You are a Leader: Now what?

As I get older, I pay less attention to what men say.  I just watch what they do.”-Andrew Carnegie

You have been tasked with a leadership role in your organization.  Now what?  As it is written in the book by Marshall Goldsmith: What Got You Here-Won’t get You There. You must now take the reins.  You must now show those who trusted in you, that you can do the job.  The company or organization expects you to streamline operations, create new ideas, accomplish more with less, and produce quality products or services, as you work to build a team who can support your vision.

The original guru on leadership, Warren Bennis, in his book: On Becoming a Leader stressed the following criteria for leadership that 20 years later still holds true: Review these criteria and take steps to make it work for you and your organization.

Activity:

  • Manage the dream-Communicate your vision and continue to reaffirm it.
  • Embrace Error-Create and encourage an atmosphere for risk taking.  It is only through action that things get done.
  • Encourage reflective backtalk-We can refer to this as feedback.  Creating a trusting environment in your organization, gives rise to honest feedback.  You then see what others see and this benefits you in what you do.
  • Leaders encourage dissent-Bring on the devil’s advocate.  It is necessary to see all angles from other perspectives to make an educated decision for the benefit of all.
  • Leaders possess the Nobel Factor-Show optimism.  See the possibilities in a negative situation. Look for that opportunity to move forward.
  • Leaders understand the Pygmalion effect– One behaves as they are treated.  You, as a leader must expect more from your subordinates.  Productivity will increase.
  • Leaders see the long view-Leaders have the patience to make certain their vision is the needed outcome.  Goals, strategies, and actions must align to foster that vision.  All takes time, planning and soulful work.
  • Leaders create strategic alliances and partnerships-Work with other organizations that are correlated with yours to foster your organization’s mission.

 

Be a leader: Your comments are of utmost importance to me in providing you with Coaching Tips.  Make suggestions and I will do my best to write that tip for you and others who will benefit.

Email Isabel at: Isabel@uniquepathways.com

I will provide a complimentary half hour of coaching upon request.  Remember, you can’t win the lottery without buying a ticket.  This ticket is free.

 

 

Coaching Tip: You Deserve Respect!-Here is how to get it.

“Nobody can hurt me without my permission.”- Mahatma Gandhi

 

Setting boundaries helps us create respect for our existence and relationship with others.  We must take the responsibility to tell others how we feel.  Healthy boundaries create honest, effective, caring communication.  By setting boundaries, we are letting others know that we have limits to what we will accept in an interaction.  We let others know what we need from them.

Become aware of: What you feel: I feel hurt, angry, embarrassed, etc.

Become aware of “being” and “behavior”: You are being a jerk (Being); You are acting in an unkind manner. (Behavior)

Begin with the person’s behavior and how it is affecting your feelings.

 

When you……

I feel…….

What I would like is……..

Or

Do you realize what you said?

That is not acceptable to me.  Or cursing is not acceptable to me.

I would appreciate if you would…….

The following may not be needed unless the individual continues in an unacceptable manner.

If you continue this behavior, I will…………. (Action you will take that will result in a consequence)

 

Activity:

During this week, consider your feelings and be ready to set boundaries.  This should lead to showing others that you respect yourself and will respect their feelings as well.

Please email your comments on the effectiveness of this activity.

Email me at:Isabel@uniquepathways.com

Coaching Tip: How are you being?

“There is a certain way of being human that is my way…..-“Charles Taylor-Multiculturalism

We all have situations during our day that effect our emotions, thoughts, mental state, body actions, actions we take or actions we do not take.  We respond to these situations trying to overcome the feelings we have if they are negative or enjoying the feelings we have if positive.  We can be empowered in some instances and dis-empowered in others.  Our way of being and our actions to the situations at hand are connected.

 

Activity:

During your days observe your way of being when situations arise.

Write down your emotions (feelings), thoughts, mental state, body actions, actions taken and non-action.

This will show how you were being.  Then revise the list with how you could be to make each category lead to a positive outcome.

Please see that you have control over how you will be.

 

Email me at: Isabel@uniquepathwways.com to tell me how this worked for you.

Coaching Tip: Habit Forming-good or bad?

“We become what we repeatedly do.”-Sean Covey

Consider that you have a certain way of doing things and behaving each day when you awake in the morning until you go to bed at night.  You are performing actions that have become habits: acts repeated so often, they becomes automatic.

Habits are made up of three parts: a cue, routine, and a reward.  According to Charles Duhigg in his book-The Power of Habits: Why we do what we do in life and business,  in order to change a habit, we must keep the cue and the reward, but change the routine.

Some Habits:  over eating, smoking, enabling, drinking, ridiculing, empowering, inspiring

Activity:

What are some habits you have that get in the way of you performing in life or business?  What are some habits that work well for you in life or business?

List each set of habits.  What is the cue? (What creates the need to do them)  What is the routine? (The action  you then take) What is the reward? (What you gain)

Remember:

“To change a habit, you must keep the old cue, and deliver the old reward, but insert a new routine.”-Charles Duhigg

Hint: Perhaps a cue is anxiety from a specific source, the routine is over eating, the reward is a sense of satisfaction or fulfillment. To attack this habit you might consider exercising instead of eating to relieve the anxiety.

Also: “Good habits are worth being fanatical about.”-John Irving: Author

 

Please take this activity to heart.  Also, report to me how your awareness of the parts of your habit have enabled you to change your routine and thus having resulted in the start of a new way of doing and being.

Email me at: isabel@uniquepathways.com

Coaching Tip: Strategies To Move Up in Your Organization

“All our dreams can come true if we have the courage to pursue them.”-Walt Disney

Dreams are a wonderful way to plan for our future.  The next steps will help you get to where you really would find the challenges you can thrive on accomplishing.  Only when you challenge yourself, will you really “rise to the occasion”.

Be creative in pursuing your dreams:

  • Be available to have a mentor-you will learn a lot and be able to align yourself with a champion.
  • Keep records of your progress and results-Show how you are working toward the company’s bottom line
  • Promote yourself and abilities-Let others know what projects you are managing and what accomplishments you have made.
  • Establish rapport with your supervisor: learn more about his/her interests-Let your supervisor understand your desires.-Your supervisor will be a great source of assistance when you find or establish the right position down the road.
  • Develop new skills –Keep marketable by gaining new knowledge about your job as well as your potential new dream position.
  • Network, Network-Develop a diverse network at your job and in personal situations. Let people know what you do, for whom you do it and the benefit to the bottom line:  Let peole know what you need to move forward to pursue your dreams.
  • Become more valuable-Show your strengths by asking to increase your responsibilities.
  • Share your knowledge-By being a team player, others will recognize your leadership qualities and desire to work toward a common goal.
  • Be a solutions provider-Provide solutions, not complaints.  Demonstrate your outlook around possibilities and opportunities.

Plan each day, do the most you can do, learn new skills, provide solutions, share your knowledge:

Pursue your dream!

Email isabel@uniquepathways.com with questions or comments.  Good luck and dream big.

 

 

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