“Nobody can hurt me without my permission.”- Mahatma Gandhi
Setting boundaries helps us create respect for our existence and relationship with others. We must take the responsibility to tell others how we feel. Healthy boundaries create honest, effective, caring communication. By setting boundaries, we are letting others know that we have limits to what we will accept in an interaction. We let others know what we need from them.
Become aware of: What you feel: I feel hurt, angry, embarrassed, etc.
Become aware of “being” and “behavior”: You are being a jerk (Being); You are acting in an unkind manner. (Behavior)
Begin with the person’s behavior and how it is affecting your feelings.
What I would like is……..
Do you realize what you said?
That is not acceptable to me. Or cursing is not acceptable to me.
I would appreciate if you would…….
The following may not be needed unless the individual continues in an unacceptable manner.
If you continue this behavior, I will…………. (Action you will take that will result in a consequence)
During this week, consider your feelings and be ready to set boundaries. This should lead to showing others that you respect yourself and will respect their feelings as well.
Please email your comments on the effectiveness of this activity.
Email me at:Isabel@uniquepathways.com